Have you figured what makes you happy? Below are the three things that help me
1) Solitude, a solitary walk in nature precisely;
2) Meditation.
3) Snow filled Rocky Mountains. I am so drawn to the Snow Mountains.
Bruce Lee said “Empty your mind, be formless, shapeless – like water. Now you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup, you put water into a bottle, it becomes the bottle, you put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now water can flow or it can crash. Be water”. Make time to meet your inner self and say Hello. He/she/It is so loving, gentle, confident and kind. Go deep within and touch it. The feeling/no feeling of beyond calm. It is just there. You don’t crave for company anymore, you don’t feel lonely ever again; you don’t feel or want happiness anymore.
We took a trip to Mount Lassen a few years ago. We were up somewhere at the top, my fellow companions took a hike; leaving me at a large snow filled, flat area. My partner understands there is a bit of a weird hermit, inside me, loves to be left completely alone, sometimes. I stud there, leaning on a rock. I said I will watch them as they climb. Inside me there was something happening, or may be nothing happened, maybe it was my imagination. It was beyond happiness, beyond joy, beyond ecstasy, I thought for a second may be I am dead still, but I am not, since everything around me is very clear, my body can feel the gentle cold breeze, maybe I am still attached to the body with a tiny string, may be not, maybe just looking at the body, staring at it. There is this calmness, beyond calmness, maybe oneness, may be beyond that, it doesn’t really matter, nothing matters, here I was, was I not, Is this the answer I am looking for all these years, all my life. Death does not matter anymore, nothing matter what ever this is I can’t really put it in words. Am I hallucinating? but I don’t do drugs, all I had that morning was a cup of coffee, and my mind still feels very clear, didn’t want to question what this is anymore, this thing or nothing I am in, god/no god, space/no space. This is enough. This answers to my quest, this is not even silence, this is the answer /no answer and this is beyond silence.
How long? I don’t know. Does it really matter? Until I heard my partner say “Are you ok Radha? You must be cold. Do you want my Jacket? I simply said “I am hungry”. I know it’s been a long day and it took us a while, to get back from the hike said my companion. I said nothing much, got up ready to leave keeping this feeling of beyond anything/nothing at all to myself. He’s gotten used to my quietness for some time now, just didn’t talk anymore. I do not like to label this as some “experience” even for fun. Yogi, guru, yoga, these words are so much used and often so misused in regular English, I thought I would rather just keep this experience/no significant experience to myself than label it in any way.. .. Happy meditation folks! I wish you all, Happiness, Joy and beyond.
“Why do we meditate? We meditate precisely because this world of ours has disappointed us and because failure looms large in our day-to-day life. We want fulfillment. We want joy, peace, bliss and perfection within and without. Meditation is the answer, the only answer” – Sri Chinmoy.
Radhika Bauerle Radhika Puranam 